you, good sir, get on my goat!

…I do not know much about goat and less still why they sit well in a curry sauce and why they look good on a rolling stones record cover both at the same time… I know no one who don't relish kashmiri goat dish rogan josh or similar exotic names except the assorted facebook vegetarians (an old indian word for bad hunters) and my eldest sister… she ate all other meat but when it came to goat, she reckoned the aroma too goaty, whatever that meant… 'hamis' was the term she used to describe the dish though it was not even a scottish recipe and remotely porky… when the afternoon rain stopped in johor bahru, malaysia, and the streets cooled, I would squat down on a low stool at an indian hawker and order a steaming bowl with two slices of white bread to dunk in the goat soup which only they knew how to make…

...also in malaysia I was led to believe goats provide you with mutton... the saying 'mutton dressed as lamb' made me regard sheep as superior to goat... yeah my growing up was pretty much blatantly specist... much later did I learn which provides what but by then my life was screwed up in some other ways... in canberra I got my goat meat, lamb, hogget and mutton more or less sorted out and got to know how I could obtain the former... from mother's nature in tuggeranong on tuesdays, from the showground market stall on some saturdays and from the halal butcher in mawson any day but tried to avoid fridays due to high demand... religious public servants flexing off friday noon for prayer meetings and others to the pubs for usual friday fare…

…800kg sandra bullock and moe…

on tracey walkers's newstead station, western queensland

I could count six goat farms around here in the valley quadrangle straddled between narooma, bermagui, cobargo and bega and they look like they are encroaching on the cows… also they make a nice visual break from the endless parade of jerseys and anguses which are also very nice... I'd like to think I'm not as specist as I once was - only towards anything porcine... but strangely enough, goat meat is hard to come by… all these bleating meat packs and not a slice to dice!... bennys butchery in cobargo doesn't sell goat but they do have premium wood (is there any other way?) smoked trouts from the snowy mountain over there... no, this is not an ad; I was looking for the connection between the goat and the fish but only found dry humour and a lame pun...

...what do these farmers do with their galore of goats besides probably milk them but not sell their meat… a wedding dowry?

...one farmer said she could part with one member of her flock, which was very xmassy of her, but I have to grab the whole carcass… that's going to be a major logistics problem when one considers one doesn't have a deep freezer handy and has no immediate plan to organize a neighbourhood goat-on-a-spit xmas orgy party...
...over yonder hills, john the maltese nice man, newly acquired a herd of 50 white-coated goats… they look a perfect postcard picture from the road when you drive by between bermagui and cobargo… all walking dinner balls to me, but he wouldn't part with any of them not that I call his goats that to his sensitive face… however, he does sell the sweetest, juiciest apples I've ever munched this side of eden, I give him that… I could just picture good old robin hood in which when they serve dinner on that massive table in the medieval castle, instead of a pig, they have a succulent whole goat with one of maltese little john's golden delicious stuck in its mouth… on another screen next door in the multiplex, a horned goathead the centerpiece presiding over a hushed circle of dark cloaked figures standing inside a pentagram… candles a-burning... the flashing glint of a dagger poised... a scream pierced the dolby sensurround... but nope no apple here…

...talking about gatherings of folks with plenty of spare time on their hands (looking for a segue here), at a conference on the supernatural, one of the speakers asked, 'who here has seen a ghost?' most hands went up…'and how about some form of interaction with a ghost?' about half the hands stayed up… 'ok, how many of you have had physical contact with a ghost? three hands remained up followed by a slight murmur in the crowd…
'well, that's interesting… let me ask if any of you have, how shall I put it, been intimate with a ghost'… one hand stayed up… the speaker was astonished, 'sir, are you telling us that you've actually had liaison with a ghost?… the guy with the hand up suddenly said, 'oh, I thought you said goat'…

my friend thea's angoras in coolagolite ©280913

...a couple more goats and I'm done with this caprine blog...

…in a suburb of Bradford, Dilldip and Dilldip decided to create a bit of the ol' country… they went out and each bought a goat…when they got home, Dilldip turned to Dilldip and said, 'Dilldip, me ol' mate, how we gonna tell who owns which feckin goat?'…Dilldip says, 'well Dilldip, i'll cut one a ta ears off my feckin goat, and ten we can tell 'em apart.'…'ah tat'd be grand,' says Dilldip
…this worked fine until a couple of weeks later when Dilldip stormed into the house…'Dilldip,' he said, 'your feckin goat has chewed the ear off a my feckin goat…now we got two feckin goats with only one ear each…how we goin ter tell who owns which feckin goat?'…'well Dilldip,' said Dilldip, 'i'll cut ta other ear off my feckin goat…ten we'll av two feckin goats and only one of them will have an ear'…'ah, tat'd be grand,' says Dilldip
…again this worked fine until a couple of weeks later when Dilldip again stormed into the house…'Dilldip,' he said, 'your feckin goat has chewed the other ear offa my feckin goat…now we got two feckin goats with no feckin ears…how we goin ter tell who owns which goat?'…'ah tis is serious, Dilldip,' said Dilldip…'i'll tell ya what i'll do…i'll cut ta tail offa my feckin goat…ten we'll have two feckin goats with no feckin ears, and only one feckin tail'…'ah tat'd be grand,' says Dilldip
…another couple of weeks went by, and you guessed it, Dilldip stormed into the house once more…'DILLDIP,' shouted Dilldip, 'YOUR FECKIN GOAT HAS CHEWED THE FECKIN TAIL OFFA MY FECKIN GOAT AND NOW WE GOT TWO FECKIN GOATS WITH NO FECKIN EARS AND NO FECKIN TAILS! HOW THE FECK ARE WE GOIN TER FECKIN TELL 'EM APART?'…'ah feck it,' says Dilldip'…'how about you have the black one, and i'll have the white one?'

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...a name I've seen on fb is Tangerine Mc Goaty Lemons... how cool is that!